Worst sex ever, what should I do?

You flee a war zone. No bed, little food. Always danger. Make it to a developed country. Menial job. Crappy bed, food. Relatively safe. Your life is done? You have all that you didn’t. Probably not. You’ll probably want a better place, better bed, more security, to give things to your kids you never could have. It doesn’t really end. So any relationship seems good when you have none, but don’t sell yourself short. Relationships have problems too, challenges unique to them. One of the biggest mistakes and self sabotages we can do in relationships is to idealize and dehumanize the other person. We are all imperfect. But most people want to feel special, and there’s nothing special about being with someone who would take anyone. What’s more- YOU aren’t the special one. You’re just a place holder for a person to project their idea of a perfect being into. They love the idea of you and not you. A bad relationship can do as much or more damage as loneliness.

But the truth is- one can be alone and not be lonely, or with someone and more lonely than ever. We are all lonely sometimes of course. But if you can’t be happy with you- neither likely can someone else. Gotta love yourself first, and part of loving yourself is seeing to your needs, and finding a partner who can care for those. Otherwise you just have a body pillow with feelings, and that’s not good for either person long term.

Thanks guest_, wise words from a wise person

Thank you too vulture. I hope there’s some help in their. We’ve all been there one time or another, and (lol) had someone else tell us that. I know it doesn’t seem helpful much when you’re in that spot. There is a light at the end of the tunnel (another thing people always tell us when we are in that position lol.) You can do it. Double down on you. It’s a bet you can’t lose.