Tiny Gecko can save you 2% on car insurance.

Ducks look so stupid making a "humanface" im their selfies.

The same line was also in Full Metal Jacket.

Hello from the otter slide.....

at first I thought that cactus was a balloon-animal dog!

Must be a dangerous highway, there's tombstones everywhere!

I like mine better: instead of using a pot, she planted her seed in the villiage where it would thrive. Everyone else kept the plant to themselves for their gain, she did what was best for everybody.

'cuz he knows otherwise she will eat half of his!

I thought "terminate the company" and "sell the company to EA" were basically the same thing....

The big question.. who the F is out there buying random loose testicles for 35k??

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TZ-V_n8SOJk

"The only good paying jobs for women have 'hand' and 'blow' before the actual 'job'."
-Paula Poundstone (I think)

Yo Dawg, I heard you like horses so I installed a horse on your horse!

One can lead to the other. Forget flowers, nothing turns on a woman like a man who does housework!

"See, i have 50 sheep."
"You only have 47 sheep."
"Yes, my job is to round them up!"

She should hang out with Wil "Shut up Wesley" Wheaton!

"It looks like you're trying to make a dumb purchase. Would you like help?"

Size matters not. Judge me by my size, do you?

yes, this looks rediculous with easy numbers like 32 and 12. But when you learn this concept and get good at it, you can do problems like 645-297 quickly in your head.

was it an ugly-ass clown, or an ugly ass-clown?

welcome to the world where everyone shops at Wal-Mart.

Probably could have been done in 10 minutes, but the make-up artist stretched it as long as he could. If that was your job, would you want to stop?